#259 -- 13 Days of Creepmas Day 13: Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the Mutant Killer Snowman (2000)

Rating: 3.5 / 5
Director: Michael Cooney

Okay, guys, this is it. It's the last day of Creepmas, and Christmas is drawing nearer. We've got a little less than two weeks to get all of our shopping and stressing done, and if you're anything like me, you've got a long way to go. But hopefully soon our bank accounts will no longer be completely empty, and we can get back to our lives. I don't know about you, but all of these Creepmas festivities have really got me in the holiday spirit.

Today brings us the sequel to the horror-comedy Jack Frost. This one is quite different from the first, because it's actually a lot more entertaining. It goes in a different direction than its predecessor, and I believe that was a smart move.

It's a year after the first of the Snowman killings and Sheriff Sam Tiler is more than a little paranoid. He's having to see a shady therapist and everything. So when a couple of their friends decide to get married on an island, Sam and his wife decide to go along. The first few murders are shrugged off, at least by the man who runs the place--who calls himself The Colonel. He tells everyone stories about shark attacks, but no one really believes him. A couple believe there's a murderer among them, but of course no one even considers the possibility of a killer snowman. Even Sam's friends, and his wife, think he's crazy for thinking of it. The only other person who sees the possibility is Agent Manners. Yep, that's right. The FBI agent who helped Sam out in the first movie is back. You probably thought he was dead, since he got stabbed in the face with a giant icicle, but you'd be surprised at what plastic surgery and an eye patch can do.

Now, at first, I thought, "Oh great, another Christmas movie set in a warm climate." I've gotten really sick of those, so I was hesitant when the movie started out. But Jack Frost is magic, and he's able to turn that tropical island into a snowy deathtrap. He freezes everything, makes it snow, and makes it possible for him to take his snowman form, rather than just a wiggling, talking carrot. Yes, for the first half of the movie he was nothing but a talking carrot lying on the ground.

Once everyone realizes that Sam was right all along, and that Jack Frost is, indeed, back from the grave they put him in, they devise a plan to stop him once again. So they load up some squirt guns filled with anti-freeze, and they create a trap. But no one knew exactly why Jack was able to return. The bottles he was trapped in were dug up, and some genetic experiments brought him back to life.

But they changed him. That, and the fact that, when he was melted into the anti-freeze in the first movie, his DNA kind of fused with Sam's. So this go 'round, the anti-freeze didn't work. Sure, it hurt him a little and kind of pissed him off, but he was still very much alive. After that failed attempt, Sam went a little cuckoo for cocoa puffs, and he wasn't good for anything for the rest of the movie--except mumbling to himself and looking like a crazy person.

When Jack swallowed some of the anti-freeze they shot at him, he choked a little and threw up a big disgusting snowball. They all took it back in their room and tried to figure out whether it was a normal snowball, or if it was Jack trying to play a trick on them. They tried melting it for a while, but it just wouldn't go down. They eventually realized that it wasn't a snowball at all, but it was an egg. A freaking egg! The egg hatched, and out came an adorable little Snowbaby. Yep, Jack Frost can reproduce this time. So not only do they have the giant killer snowman to worry about, but they've all his little evil offspring trying to kill them as well. It reminded me a little bit of Gremlins, because when the Snowbabies weren't killing people, they were just off getting drunk and having a good time. There was even one of them that had an icicle mohawk, which reminded me of Stripe, the leader of the gremlins. They were cute as can be, but they were pretty vicious too.

It took everyone a while to figure out how to kill them this time, but once they did...it was pretty damn hilarious. Turns out, when Jack's and Sam's DNA fused together, Jack picked up one of Jack's allergies. If that alone isn't funny enough for you...Just watch the movie, and the item that kills them will bring tears of laughter to your eyes.

And now...the best part. At the end, when the loving couple realizes it's officially their wedding day, they decide to have a little on-the-spot reception. They say some wedding-like mumbo jumbo, and then Jack pops up and says, "I now pronounce you...Totally freakin' dead!" If for no other reason, just watch the movie to see that one scene. It's probably one of the funniest things I've heard in a horror movie, and I've seen a lot of funny horror movies.

So there you have it. Jack Frost 2 is an improvement upon the original. Where the original was one of those kind of serious, but mostly silly types of horror movies...this one was just downright silly. It was funny, it had some blood, costume parties, a little side-boob, and it's a jolly good Christmas ride. My last day of Creepmas turned out pretty damn good, and I'm glad for it. I'd hate to end it on a sour note.

So Merry Creepmas everyone. Have a good holiday, be safe, and remember..."Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack gouged eyes out with candle sticks." So if you see some innocent snowmen out there this Christmas, they might not be so innocent after all.

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