#277 -- Attack of the 50 Foot Cheerleader (2012)

Director: Kevin O'Neill
Rating: 3 / 5

If you go into a movie like this expecting it to actually be scary, you sir (or madam), are dumb. The title, the poster--everything about it screams "don't take me seriously!" and that's exactly what you have to do to be able to enjoy it. I knew it was going to be silly, which is exactly why I wanted to see it.

It was about a young girl named Cassie, who was a freshman in college. Her mother was head cheerleader, and a member of a prestigious sorority, back in her day. Cassie's only goal for college was to live up to her mother's expectations; but Cassie was a scientist, nerdy and somewhat homely, so that wasn't as easy as she'd hoped. Everyone made fun of her, no one took her cheerleading or sorority goals seriously, and she was down in the dumps. But luckily, she and her lab partner, Kyle (Ryan Merriman) were working on a drug that could make ugly animals cute. It was kind of like a plastic surgery injection. They weren't really sure if it could work on humans, but Cassie was desperate. She injected some of the stuff (which was a bright bubble-gum pink fluid) into her arm. It did, indeed, make her beautiful. After that, everyone did start taking her more seriously. She made the cheerleading squad, she was being accepted by the people in the sorority, and all the guys couldn't get enough of her. But there was just one little side effect. Okay, maybe one giant side effect: it made Cassie grow really tall really fast. It also made her a little bit more aggressive than she usually was.

Once she got to a certain size, Kyle and their professor (Ted Raimi!) started working on an antidote. Meanwhile, some guys who were hoping to buy the drug for use on humans, discovered Cassie and tried to abduct her (they didn't want her going to a rival company and giving up the drug). Also, across campus, one of the cheerleader bitches accidentally got injected with the stuff. It didn't really make her look any different, since she was "beautiful" to begin with, but it did make her grow too. Since she was already a bitch, it turned her into a super giant bitch with even more of an attitude. And the only one who could stop her was Cassie, of course. The action culminated on the football field, with one gigantic women's wrestling match.

So, I liked the idea, obviously. It was just silly enough to pique my interest. It was done pretty well, and it featured two actors that I always enjoy (Merriman and Raimi). Some of the other actors weren't all that great, including Cassie (Jena Sims) at times. But I could overlook that due to the overly silly nature of the movie. I think it adequately depicted the stereotypical movie-college life, and it had some interesting points. I loved the ending, though it was 100% predictable. I knew exactly what was going to happen, but I was glad that it did. Cassie eventually learned that the life she'd yearned for wasn't all that it was cracked up to be, and she learned to be happy with who she really was. So it's got a good message for all the girls out there: you don't have to be super hot to get a super hot, smart guy to love you. Yeah, there's hope for all of us.

The scenes with the two giant cheerleaders were done pretty well. There were times where you could tell that there was a green screen involved, and other times where it looked natural. It wasn't perfect by any means, but it was good.


Cinematography - 7 points. Like I said, it wasn't perfect. But it did look good most of the time.

Characters - 9 points. All the characters had something to offer. Whether you love or hate them, they'll all get some kind of reaction out of you. Though this is true, not all of the actors were great.

Gore - 7 points. There wasn't any gore at all, but I don't think there was supposed to be. The effects were pretty good, which I'm glad for given the material. I'd hate to see a movie about a giant cheerleader that had terrible effects!

Comedy - 8 points. Since it wasn't meant to be scary, I'm omitting the "scariness" category and substituting it for comedy. It was definitely meant as a comedy, and it mostly succeeded. The material itself was comedic, and it did have some pretty funny moments. However, it wasn't as silly and funny as I'd hoped it would be. It could have done a lot better in that department.

Storyline - 10 points. I really liked it. The idea of anything giant is always intriguing to me, especially if it's a person (or a sea monster!). The idea of the plastic surgery injection thing was cool, I liked the little love story it had going on, and I loved how the movie ended on such a good note.

Overall score - 41 / 50

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