Rating: 4/5
I'm all about some ghost stories lately, for some reason. Here's the thing about ghost stories: they're either really good or completely horrible. This one is pretty awesome. First, a little backstory. In the early 1900s, a man named Burkitt went bonkers and killed his family. He got his wife with a hacksaw, and his six children with a meat tenderizer. He arranged their heads around the dinner table, before sawing off his own arms and legs and joining them. Fast forward to the present...Sarah's having a halloween/birthday party in the long-abandoned Burkitt manor. Don't worry, I'm jealous of the whole birthday on Halloween thing too. But in this case, it's not such a good thing. See, Sarah's party was a surprise, and by the time she found out about it and showed up, half her friends were already dead. Oh, and these aren't your average ordinary ghosts. They're more like zombies. And once one of the friends got killed, they turned into one of them too. They didn't eat anyone, but they definitely looked more like zombies than ghosts.
Someone looked under a bed to find these two little bundles of joy. AHHH!
I must mention that Sarah was sort of a karate master, so when the last of her friends died, she went all Bruce Lee on one of the ghost-zombies. It sounds kind of lame, but it really wasn't. Sarah was a bad-ass! And she was dressed as Elvira! Anyways, the fight kind of looked like a bar-fight, except the zillion stab wounds, and the fact that Sarah split the ghost in half with a katana. A couple more pluses for this movie: Tom Savini had a cameo as Sarah's friend's uncle Tom, the electrician. And, Sarah came home from school with a cardboard cut-out of Jason Voorhees that said "Happy birthday!" in a speech bubble. I'm so jealous!
My thoughts? This movie was great. One of the last lines was, "Hey, that's a big hammer." And then the guy gets said hammer (which was actually a meat tenderizer) to his face. The ending was one of those "Ain't that a bitch" deals, but I don't want to ruin anything, so I'll leave it at that.
WHAT WE'VE LEARNED:
- Don't have a halloween/birthday party in a haunted manor.
- Katanas and kung-fu skills are very effective against ghosts.
- In haunted houses, if you cut yourself on a nail, all of your skin will fall off and you will magically grow hair.
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