#73 -- Halloween (1978)

Director: John Carpenter

Rating: 3 / 5

Please excuse me for a few moments, while I become incredibly cliche, and review Halloween on Halloween. I would also like to warn you: I have never been a fan of these movies, so pardon me if I get a little bit bitchy with it. While I'm not a fan of the movie, I do respect it, John Carpenter and even Michael Myers for what they've done for the industry of horror movies. 

Now that all that's out of the way, let's continue. In 1963, After a young boy murders his sister, he is sent away to a mental facility for fifteen years. Now, in 1978, he returns to his hometown to continue his killing. The movie centers on a young babysitter, Laurie, who Michael seems to be drawn to. It's been a good while since these movies came out, and I think it's safe to say that every horror fan out there knows the story. But we'll just pretend, for the moment, that we don't know. So, why is Michael so drawn to Laurie? Why does he so desperately want to kill her? Well, it doesn't explain very much here: only that he killed his sister when he was a child, is very dangerous, and out of his fucking mind. 

Dr. Loomis, who looked over Michael in the facility, tracks him down to Haddonfield. He's the jumpiest doctor I've ever seen. His part is comical to say the least, in that he jumps at every little sound or movement. He reminds me of my chihuahua. Laurie is busy looking after two children, and she ignores their warnings that the boogeyman is coming. It is a mistake, of course, because she learns that the boogeyman is real - just a little bit too late. I only say boogeyman because that is what they call him in the movie. He's the most un-scary boogeyman I've ever seen in my life. Laurie is your typical stupid teenager, except I think she's stupider than most. Her best effort at hiding is to leave the bedroom door open, hide in a closet and tie the doors together. 

Michael was ruined for me when they had him cover himself in a bed-sheet, put some horrid glasses on his face and then strangle a girl with a phone chord. It is beyond stupid, and Michael is - in my opinion - the worst slasher EVER. His kills are slow, boring, and the action is seriously lacking. I understand that it was made in the seventies on a limited budget, and I will admit that it's pretty good considering. While the movie isn't too bad, I just do not like the character of Michael Myers. He is boring - simple as that. Again, I'm not a fan of the movie, but I respect it. I understand that I will probably get some shit for this, considering Halloween's huge iconic status - but I really don't care. I considered going easy on Michael, but then I realized that this is my blog and I can do whatever the hell I want. So poo on Michael Myers. Poo on him! I give this movie three stars simply because of the impact it had on horror movies in general, and because my dear Jason might not exist if not for this dummy.